Emotional eating is something that we can all get hit by and is something that we need to understand the triggers of and how to deal with. I tend to be a pretty emotional guy but I never seem to fall into the trap of emotional eating which can involve people eating large amounts of food to comfort themselves and get rid of the bad or tough feelings and situations that we can run into in everyday life.

The trouble is that often emotional eating can be caused by bad feelings about our weight and self image and we sabotage ourselves using food as a short term fix.

How Does Emotional Eating Start?

There are really five kinds of situations where we can get triggered emotionally and that may lead to emotional eating. (Thanks to medicinenet for these). Knowing the causes can really help us learn how to stop emotional eating.

Social – Eating when around other people. For example, excessive eating can result from being encouraged by others to eat; eating to fit in; arguing; or feelings of inadequacy around other people.

Emotional – Eating in response to boredom, stress, fatigue, tension, depression, anger, anxiety or loneliness as a way to “fill the void.”

Situational – Eating because the opportunity is there. For example, at a restaurant, seeing an advertisement for a particular food, passing by a bakery. Eating may also be associated with certain activities such as watching TV, going to the movies or a sporting event, etc.

Thoughts – Eating as a result of negative self-worth or making excuses for eating. For example, scolding oneself for looks or a lack of will power.

Physiological – Eating in response to physical cues. For example, increased hunger due to skipping meals or eating to cure headaches or other pain.

And what do many people do? Grab a tub of ice cream or cookies or other comfort food to try to make feeling bad feel better. If you are not in the situation this can seem crazy but in the situation and doing this emotional eating will feel really natural. Trying to fill a void with the great feelings of yummy food.

Trouble is yummy food can not fix a problem.

How to Stop Emotional Eating

How to stop emotional eating

OK, now that we know the why it is much easier to figure out the how to stop emotional eating. So the best and really only thing that you can do is to distract yourself. I have found myself that there is no talking yourself or reasoning yourself out of an emotional problem or issue so a good distraction until your emotions go away and you can reason things is much better. Here are a few things you can do:

Watch some light TV – Get yourself out of the thought pattern that is causing your emotional distress

Talk to a friend about their problems – problem solving not your stuff but someone elses will get your mind fixing something else

Go and exercise – This can be a crutch in itself but really if you can concentrate on the issue of the exercise hopefully it switches the emotion to another issue

You can see from above that these are just a few things that you can do, there are a multitude more but the real idea is to get away from what is causing you pain right now. and then a few minutes or hours later you can revisit the problem in a detached way and find real solutions to your problems.

We all get too close to our own issues emotionally and blow them up so that they are insurmountable. By breaking away from our emotional explosions we can get some distance and avoid the emotional eating that can be so dangerous to our psyche and our eating goals.

How to stop emotional eating all comes down not to controlling your emotions but getting a distance from them until you can deal with the underlying problem.

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Yesterday and the rest of this week will involve a lot of juggling. Nothing unmanageable, but my comment participation will be slow until Monday. Either way, your comments are brilliant and thoughtful. I’m still trying to answer yesterday’s question for myself.

Today though, is another question. I’m in a new Intention Circle with a lot of my creative lady friends and the question we’re trying to answer is “what does your ideal day look like?” This is more like a dream day, a fantasy. A life without barriers.

I realized in the past week as I try to answer this question: I am living my ideal life. That is not intended to be smug, but I’m realizing that the reason why this answer is so difficult is because my ideal life, IS my life. Sure, my dream day starts in Tuscany and ends at a dance party in NYC, but that’s just one day. I don’t want to live in Tuscany or NYC. I love where I live, because it was my design. Living in rural Virginia was a choice, a strange one to many, but a choice that excites me.

The thing is, the day I stepped foot in Brooklyn (or perhaps the day I left college) was the day that I understood that I am the captain of this ship. My life is not perfect, I want to be in a healthier body, I’d love to have a magazine-organized house, I’d love to travel more. But, oh my goodness. My life is a good life. I wake up and I have work to do, work that I love. Work that people pay me to do. In my pajamas most days. And others, if I want, I can get dressed to the nines.

My husband is a huge chunk of my life. Which probably makes some squeamishness and uncomfortable. Others may say, how dare you place so much importance on your husband. But, I do. He was a dream. And goodness, if I had one tidbit of advice, it is: marry a good man. Marry a man who calls you beautiful every day. Challenges you. Sees your potential and supports you. I challenged myself at a young age to marry someone who is present, who cares, who is thoughtful and creative. It helps that he is incredibly good looking. But, I didn’t settle for comfort, or ideals.

I have health insurance.  A goal that was on my new years resolution for three years. I’ve done catering, jewelry, and now clothing design. All because I want to. Not because it’s a task given to me. And sure, some things I realize I’m not suited for, but at least I did it. I have the freedom to try. And fail. And try again.

Everyday I feel at home in our house. There is no doubt in my mind that this is the house I’m supposed to live in at this stage of my life. It’s small and humble. And people tell us “you can’t do that in your house! it’s too small”. Well, I’m sorry, but three bedrooms and two baths is more than enough room for two people, 2 cats and a rabbit. And hell, if we want a baby, we’ll make room. We didn’t over extent ourselves with the best house on the block to be impressive. We don’t have the nicest car, to make us look successful. Those things, while they may fit in a dream day. Are not my ideal.

My ideal day involves, a plush white bed, a morning run, a leisurely day where I cook in the kitchen, and create in my studio. And while I don’t have a plush white bed, I could have it.  TJMaxx is only 25 minutes away. And while I don’t exercise everyday…I could. But, I have a really nice bed. I cook often and I’m creative in my studio because those things make a happy life for me.

And so I asked my husband what his ideal day looks like. And after a few silent minutes. He replied “I’m already living it”. And he is, and I knew that would be his answer. Sure, he doesn’t have the best music studio in the world, or even Floyd for that matter. But he made one happen. And it’s pretty amazing. Six years ago he said “I don’t want an office job” and two months later he never looked back. He made that happen. He reads, and studies and works hard for this life.

And so I’m realizing that the things I want, are not things or perhaps even actions, but thoughts. I want to be nicer to myself. I want to feel my feelings. I want to forgive people a little easier. I want to dance and sing a little more freely. I want to forgive myself for not always doing the right thing. My ideal day is realizing how great I have it and not wasting it on petty thoughts and negativity. My ideal day is an easy smile, a guilt-free slice of chocolate cake, it’s being passionate, seeing things through, and getting a little (or a lot) sweaty.

So I extent this question to you…what does your ideal day look like?

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I keep watching Biggest Loser and get warped into their way of thinking that change has to happen before your eyes and right away. Fortunately none of us are on a TV show to have to lose it right away or get set home instead.

Two days ago I wrote about what we need to eat, yesterday was what to avoid but really as far as eating goes I would never want to choose to live with eating only fruit and veggies and meat. Really we have to figure out how to eat other stuff but not always and in a metered way. That is why I wanted to talk about sacrifice and suffering. But first lets hit on starvation.

Starvation is Not Dieting

I don’t think that any of us want to starve and if you are eating a few times a day, eating small meals that are full of nutrients then we will not starve. Years ago when I was struggling with money my wife asked me what was the worst thing that I was worried about. I told her it was food. I have a very close relationship with food, probably all of us do and she promised that we would not starve, sacrifice anything but food and shelter and everything will work out.

Anyway we have no reason to starve and that is where the suffering and sacrifice come from. If I tell you that you are not allowed to ever have a chocolate chip cookie ever again then you will think of nothing but chocolate chip cookies. So this is not a this or that or a never eat kind of concept but I really do feel that if you want something, be it a cookie or ice cream then you should be able to have a little bit and not have to live in guilt. But on the other hand, I never see a reason to eat a whole tub of ice cream either, there is just no point in that.

How to Eat, Think  and not Suffer

Ice cream is not food

What I am really saying that if all our gains or losses are in eating (not true exercise has a lot to do with it as well) then you want to fuel your body with water rich foods. After that make sure that you do that subtle mind change. Food is fuel and candy is just the junk that tastes good. Cheat with just small amounts of food so that you do not crave badly and overdo things. Remember you goal is to eat very healthy and the crappy food you eat, while not good, will not help you in any way.

Tomorrow I want to write more about emotional eating. Even though I touched on emotional eating here there is a lot more to talk about with that.

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I saw this comment on Facebook yesterday from Geneen Roth, it really hit home for me why I’m doing this challenge.

“The most radical part of my own story is not that I stopped dieting; it’s that I stopped trying to fix myself. I stopped fighting with myself, stopped blaming myself, my mother, my latest boyfriend for my weight. And since diets were my most flagrant attempt at fixing myself, I stopped them as well. What would your life be like if you stopped trying to fix yourself?”

I’m curious to know…

What would your life be like if you stopped trying to fix yourself?

Side note: I will be out of the comments until this evening.

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Today I want to write about the foods to avoid for better health. So yesterday, just as a recap I wrote about the five things you should eat. Meat, veggies, fruit, milk, water. I know that these are the staples of what we should eat but I know that as a core we do not tend to eat just those things.

But here is the thing, eat those foods as the basis of your daily diet. Everything else is extra and not as good.

So I want to make a short list of what to avoid or not eat as much of. These may seem obvious but the point is that what we put in our mouth is often not well though through.

Foods to Avoid for Better Health

Foods to Avoid for Better Health

1. Bread – I know that this is a very broad one but bread, although offering some carbs and nutrients is not a core food to me. I eat it but I also do try to avoid it (breadsticks anyone?). This is not the worst food but your body can turn this into fat fairly quickly as the calories are pretty dense.

2. Rice and Potatoes – Another complex carb these two are the basis of most people dinners. You have a piece of meat, a vegetable, and a half a plate of mashed potatoes or rice. Both of these do have some nutrients but because of the carbs per once of food the calories will add up quick and be stored as fat in your body

3. Fried Foods – Frying food in many parts of the world is a constant and normal type of cooking. Fried chicken, fried fish, french fries, deep fried snickers bars. There are a couple problems with these fried foods and these are the loss of nutrients in the frying process and the gobs of calories in fat added needlessly to the food.

4. Pop or Soda – Apparently what I call pop in Canada is called soda in America. Anyway these are of course empty calories and I am as guilty as many for this. I have a can a coke a day which is the equivalent number of calories as a regular meal. There is no redeeming value in sodas, no nutrients, contain caffeine, and they work as a diuretic robbing your body of water.

5. Sweet or fried Snacks – This should be obvious to everyone so it was an easy one for this list. Sugar turns to fat easily, no nutrients, blood sugar peaks and valleys. These snacky foods that can fill a pantry easily are not at all good, mostly very bad and should be avoided.

So lets have a caveat here. I take shots at the food above and we all know why we should avoid it but they are around and we still want to eat them right? I am a real person and I do eat all of the above but the fact is that we need to realize the importance of good eating and the result of bad eating. I would not expect anyone to completely take all of the above out of their eating plans but at the same time you have to be careful.

This leads me into what I want to write about tomorrow which is sacrificing food habits and how to avoid it.

Hope this list of foods to avoid for better health just helps you think about things as they are today.

Yesterday was a great success. I have to thank all of you for taking the time to leave feedback, not just with me, but with everyone else in the comment area. That was so nice and encouraging to watch.

There were times yesterday when I would eat small meals in anticipation for hunger. Which would push hunger back even more. I’m fine with this. I don’t want to get caught up in the mind swirls of “what is hunger” , “am I truly hungry?”, “is starving hungry?” because it could go on for hours and days. And at the heart of it, I know what overeating looks like, and that is what I’m aiming to avoid.

For example, I made a delicious dinner of chickpea coconut curry with rice. I wasn’t hungry when I made it so I took a bite, because it just looked good. A couple of hours later, I still wasn’t overly hungry, but I pulled out a tiny bowl that holds about a cup of food and I enjoyed a little bit. And that was that. As I look over yesterday I see one trend: several small meals scattered throughout the day. I was never stuffed and never starving.

I counted my calories out of curiosity and vowed to myself that I would not feel guilt over whatever the number came out to be. After exercise, I net about 1,300 calories. That is extremely good for me. I also baked, twice, and did not overeat. I feel like I’m playing with fire, but vowed that I would be honest with whatever happened. I made two loaves of pumpkin chocolate bread, ate one thin slice and put the rest way for later. I also made a batch of French Madeleines. Ate one, put the rest away for tea time today. I. Put. Them. Away. And they aren’t haunting me. I really believe removing guilt, removes the power of food. As does eating for the wrong reasons.

Today, I want to work on a list of things to do to keep my hands busy when I’m taking a break from work, but don’t want to watch TV. Art journaling is at the top of the list. I’ve been longing to paint and create collages lately. I think this will be a good thing for me artistically. It will also keep me from eating from emotions.

And finally, I think I will keep this post open throughout the day for updates and picture posts. Please feel free to use the comments area of this post if you need support, want to chat, or just want to say hello throughout the day.

I woke up super early today to get a lot of work done. Right now, I’m more thirsty than hungry. Drinking lots of water. Maybe an iced coffee soon and then breakfast. Avoiding the scale until this weekend, I’m in the water retention portion of the month and I’d just rather wait it out.

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Welcome to day one, week one of the Waiting for Hunger Challenge! I’ve compiled a list of participants in hopes that we can encourage each other in the coming days and weeks as we form new habits. It’s not too late to join us; feel free to leave a comment in this post if you’d like to be added to the list.

Waiting for Hunger Participants

BCGirlie

Happy Girl 

Kayla 

Erika

Lindsay

Kelsey

Jackie

Rennie

Ella

Yaya

Jen

I’ll be using the comments section as a chat area too for communication throughout the day. Today’s theme is using smaller plates and bowls. I’ve heard this tip numerous times, and it wasn’t until this morning that I decided to actually see how it would work.

I woke up around 7am pretty hungry. Because I’m in a cold cereal phase right now I grabbed one of my smallest bowls off the shelf. I know that cereal doesn’t do much for my hunger and I’ve had issues in the past with overeating it, but I’m ready to try again. It’s what I wanted. Small bowl of Mother’s Choice Honey O’s with whole organic milk.

About three hours later I could feel hunger pangs again. I got a few chores and work done and decided that I would make one of my favorite big breakfasts for me and Josh. Doing this would require a few habit changes 1) getting over the guilt of feeling hungry again 2) using a smaller plate 3) eating slowly and enjoying my food 4) being okay with leftovers and 5) instead of dividing the food in half I presented everything buffet style and filled my little appetizer plate without layering. By doing this, I was eating a fourth of what I normally would. In the future I hope to get used to preparing smaller amounts of food and being comfortable with having less on hand. For now, I’m okay with putting it in the refrigerator for later.

Another tip was cutting things like bread into smaller pieces. Normally I would have two large slices of bread, four slices of bacon, two eggs and a cup of fried potatoes. No wonder I have food issues.  Today, using the small plate method, I at 1/2 slice of bread, 2 slices of bacon, 1 egg, and about 1/4-1/2 c. potatoes. That’s a significant difference and I’m full, but not uncomfortably so.

I’m realizing and truly trying to understand that I don’t need so much food. I ordered a salad last night and couldn’t believe how enormous it was. It was enough for 2-3 meals.

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I debated what I would call this challenge.  I went back and forth on using the word “hunger” because it’s loaded. Because people in the world are actually hungry and do not have the luxury of eating when they’re not. There are also people in the world who deny themselves food when they are hungry. I first called it the “feeling it challenge” and then the “wait for it challenge”. And then a million other combinations of words that just didn’t feel right. So in advance, this challenge means exactly what it says: waiting for hunger to eat.

In the past week I’ve been challenging myself to 1) wait for hunger to eat 2) stop at the first signs of full 3) feel the feelings of wanting to eat outside of hunger 4) sit down and eat without watching tv or being in front of the computer 5) find something else to fill the need 6) eliminate guilt from eating. I’m realizing that when I wait for hunger, it takes less food to make me full. When I eat from habit or emotion, I will never, ever be full. This is profound for me. It is profound because I know how much food I need in a day. When I eliminate guilt, the power is gone.

In the past two times I’ve gone out to eat, I’ve slowed down. To drink water, to have conversation, to look around. I’m not stuffing food in my face. I’m making different decisions. When I’m at home, a different challenge arises, having food around all the time. So I make myself think harder. To write down what I’m feeling and to do something else. Anything that will make me happier than overeating. This challenge is not about guilt, deprivation or starvation. It’s about eating, stress free, and then stopping. It’s about moving on.

Yesterday I was more productive and happy  than I’ve been in a long time. I created a task jar where I write down all of the tasks I want to get done on post-it notes. I fold them up and drop them in the jar. I shake it a little and pick one at random. I do that task and nothing else. I was focused. And it worked for me. I completed 14 tasks. I was only tempted to overeat once (yogurt with dark chocolate peanut butter). I got stuff done that I’ve been sitting on for weeks. Stuff I was waiting for the “perfect situation” to complete.

I bring this up because I found something that worked for me. I’ve been making to-do lists and detailed plans using other peoples methods for as long as I can remember. I just don’t work that way. I get overwhelmed, I find excuses and then I just drop it all. I become paralyzed by methods that do not work for me. And the same goes for eating. All I need to change my life if is to wait for hunger. I know how to eat. I know how much my body needs to lose weight. I trust that in myself. When I count calories or eliminate food, it’s because I don’t trust myself. And I end up eating without hunger. Programs, for me, cover the problem. They put power in food, rather than me. I know it works for people. But, as I sit here, still in need of losing 150 + pounds, I need a new way. My way.

So if you feel like you might benefit from this challenge, I encourage you to leave a comment. For the next week I’m making a promise to myself that I will not eat when I’m not genuinely hungry. If I want to eat, I will write instead. I will sew a skirt. I will blog about something fun. I will decorate my house. I will hug my husband. I will do something, anything, that fills me up without food. This isn’t about counting calories, or feeling guilty over any food decision I make. This isn’t about nutrition, or avoiding food groups. It’s simple: only eat when you’re hungry without distractionsand stop eating when you’re full. If you’re in, I will support you in anyway I can. I will correspond in the comments. I will visit your blog. We can do this!

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Can Anyone Do Zumba? Zumba exercises are being touted as the newest fun way to lose weight, Zumba instructors call it “exercise in disguise”, but this doesn’t mean that Zumba is easy. On the contrary, Zumba will leave you panting and sweating as you get going. So is it suitable for everyone?

Can Anyone Do Zumba?

Can Anyone Do Zumba?

Zumba classes are fantastic for bringing people of all shapes, sizes and ages together. The key premise is to have fun, and the workouts are suitable for just about everyone. Kids are even invited to certain Zumba classes! Even if you’re very overweight, you can take it at your own pace until your stamina improves.

If you’re pregnant, Zumba exercises are still a possibility. However, it all depends on your level of activity before you became pregnant. If you’re not used to aerobic exercise then it’s not usually a good idea to start during pregnancy. Always ask your doctor before proceeding.

What About Older Participants?
Zumba Gold classes have been designed specifically with the older generation in mind. It’s the same premise, just slightly altered to suit the fitness levels of the baby boomers. For those who have specific physical issues, it’s a good idea to ask your instructor before you begin. Many are happy to advise you on how to take part in a regular Zumba class at your own pace. Some classes are even designed to be followed from the comfort of a chair, if you need to.

If You Know You’re Out Of Shape…
If you’re out of shape, that is you don’t regularly exercise and find you get tired out quickly, then you should always approach any new form of exercise with caution. Listen to your body, and know your own limits. Yes, you will probably be tired out after a Zumba session, but you’ll notice the improvements week on week. Remember, if you’re in any doubt you should always visit a doctor for advice.

What About Zumba At Home?
There are a variety of Zumba games and DVDs that’ll teach you how to do the Zumba exercises from home. These are generally safe, and are often designed at a more basic level than some Zumba classes. The main risk with an at-home option is that you may not have the motivation to really push yourself to burn those calories! If you do decide to do Zumba at home, the same rules as above still apply: listen to your body, and visit a doctor if you experience any problems.

So they answer to Can Anyone Do Zumba? is in fact yes although you want to be careful of the class that you do take.

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Zumba routines do not require you to wear any special equipment but that will never stop people from trying to have a little fun. The best thing about Zumba routines is that they don’t require much equipment to be effective. That said, you do need to make sure you’re wearing the right clothing to perform the moves comfortably. Here’s a guide to what you should wear, and some other accessories that might come in handy, for your Zumba classes.

What Equipment for Zumba Routines

What Equipment for Zumba Routines

Clothing – Zumba routines are best performed in clothing you feel comfortable wearing. You can wear traditional sports clothing, just as you would for yoga or any other fitness class. Depending on how confident they feel, some women choose to show off their midriff in a crop top to keep cool. There’s also a range of colorful clothing available in the Zumbawear range, released by the creator of Zumba, but it certainly isn’t necessary to perform the workout.

Shoes – Traditional sneakers aren’t always the best choice for Zumba, as they could slip on the smooth surface of the dance hall when you’re moving around at high speed. Instead, opt for sneakers that have been designed for dance to ensure you don’t slip as you perform the various moves.

Zumba Toning Sticks – Toning Sticks are much like traditional dumbbells, with a few important differences. Aside from the rounded design, the main difference is that the Toning Sticks are filled with sand. Not only does this create the weight that you need to get fit and tone up, it also turns these fitness items into musical instruments!Toning Sticks really enhance the traditional Zumba vibe by encouraging you to shake in time with the music and have some fun!

Zumba Chain Tassels – These chains are more for decoration than anything else. The fact that they rattle and make noise as you dance will encourage you to stay in time and literally “feel” the music.

Wipe Away Sleeves/ Sweatbands – You’ll find a few different “Wipe Away Sleeves” in the Zumbawear range. These are designed to be worn over the arms. As you work up a sweat, use these sleeves to wipe it off your face and keep yourself feeling as comfortable as possible. Another alternative is to wear a sweatband on your head and wrists.

Zumba Belt For Games – If you prefer to do your Zumba workouts from the comfort of your own home then you’ll want to get hold of a fitness belt to use with your game. Unless you’re using Kinect, you’ll need the fitness belt to house your controller and keep track of how you’re moving.

Remember, Zumba routines really don’t require much equipment or special clothing! You can get them as you advance, but for now you just need to turn up with a bottle of water ready to replenish all that sweat you’ll be losing!