How to Stop Overwhelm and Get To Your Goals

Sometimes we want to act and we will take the long view and allow external issues to hold us back. I have been running into this lately and see it as something that use to stop me but now I try to compartmentalise stuff so that I can keep everything I can control on track.

The issue right now in our house is our upcoming Kidney March.

Kidney March History

A few months ago we signed up to do the Alberta Kideny March. This is a 100 kilometer walk that raises money and awareness for Kidney research for people like our daughter that face a kidney transplant.

When we signed up I was a bit slow getting started, it was a few months away, I knew that I had stuff coming up now, I had training walks to eventually do and fundraising. My wife on the other hand started fundraising and having success with it immediately and pulled me out the door for some training walks.

Now after a couple or three months of not doing anything about our Kideny March stuff my wife is suddenly nervous. We have to raise more money, what will we do with the kids that weekend?, my stomach problems are bad, we haven’t trained enough. All of these issues and even a couple more problems are in her way while my procrastination finally stopped and I have started doing longer training walks and know that I will definitely be ready for three days of 30+ kilometer walks.

With all of my wifes fears heading towards us I just want to walk and get ready. She isn’t there yet, but she is close

How to Handle Personal Projects

personal-planningWe had a long talk last night and there are a few things we can do. We can handle each of our outstanding issues separately and look at these as single issues, not all intertwined as one giant project.

I hope that now that my wife is onside with this that we can start moving forward but I have to admit that in this light I am looking pretty good which is not really fair. I am always the one turning everything into a ball of problems and not breaking things out and can never move forward until I untangle feelings, fears, problems, and possible solutions to try and fix everything.

I know I am not the only one that does this, it must be common but really so often we will feel the need to straighten everything out before we take action.

  • I can’t fix my diet until I go shopping again and finish the food in the house and find the perfect diet for me
  • I can’t get in shape until I join a gym and find a trainer and schedule to workout and the perfect workout routine
  • I can’t look for another job until I find my purpose and passions, and get training, and acceptable knowledge and build out my social network
  • I will not write a book until I have researched the subject thoroughly, found a writing coach and researched successful writers
  • I can’t, I need, I want, I have to get it together

Does this sound like you? I know it often sounds like me. I overanalyze most situations until I feel I am ready and so often we do not even foresee the actual problems that will come up in real life. Usually I make the issues that would come up as far more insurmountable then they really are.

Take First Actions

The real secret to success in most things is the first action. Once you take that action you can see what the next action should be and even if you have not prepared for what is coming up later you don’t have to have a fix until later anyway.

When I first looked at the Getting Things Done system I, like a lot of others, didn’t like the lack of planning for projects. When you look though now at what I am talking about with just worrying about the next step then it makes things work a lot better.

Do you do this as well? Not act until everything is ready?

Try doing this yourself, make a list of all the things that you need or want to get done and look at the first step. I can tell you that when you take that first step all the pressure feels like it is off. I have seen the September 6th date for the start of the Kidney March and just shook my head. Once I started my training in earnest though I now feel a heck of a lot better. I can now see what kind of training that I need to do so the pressure is off. I know that I can get these training sessions in so the pressure is off. I know for me the only other part is the fundraising and I can find the time for that so the pressure is off.

If we look back at the issues my wife is worries it is the same thing. Start fundraising again and ask for donations. Call some people to find a place for the kids for a couple days. Go to the doctor for some antibiotics for the stomach issues. And go for some training walks to see how close she is for being ready to walk. All have a next step.

I hope this post gets you mind churning a bit. I bet you, just like me, have a lot of outstanding things that you have been holding off on maybe for months or years that you can finally start and get on the road to finishing.

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Measured and Sustained Action

One of the things that I have really learned with my daughter and her Kidney disease is that we have up times and down times and we need to really take advantage of both.

Kidney Disease But Still Super Active

taylorOur daughter Taylor, when she is feeling good likes to go on long bike rides and hikes and has lots of energy for that but then she does need to have her downtime and will be quiet and read or watch TV for the next day or so. Taylor has a far more balanced life than most people and it is because she wants to always do stuff but knows that the downtime has to happen and that sleeping and eating are critical for her health.

I learn a lot from Taylor, and you can too

I find that once I start moving I don’t want to stop. I like to be active with my hockey, weightlifting, training for my Kidney March, and anything else we can find to do. The trouble is that there is no urgency, I don’t schedule a lot of outings with the kids we just run with it so if I miss a day of exercise then it is no big deal. But it should be.

Really we need to schedule our exercise and activities or they probably won’t get done. There is a finite number of hours in the day and some things just always get in the way. Work, eating, sleeping, household and family chores, lots of stuff. If we don’t plan our fun, active stuff then it will not happen.

Downtime – Very Important

On the other side is our quiet time. I am worse for this and feel bad about it but we all need that time just to relax and recharge. Sitting in the backyard listening to the neighbourhood and sipping some kind of drink, meditative times just reflecting on where we have been and where we are going, and less active activities where we just get to hang with the family and friends and be truly present instead of thinking about the next thing that we are going to do (A whole blog post is sitting in that statement).

And sleep. I wish I was the guy that could thrive on 5 hours sleep a night but certainly I am not. I need my sleep and I count this as really the majority of my downtime. I listen to a quiet podcast, maybe read, and then fall asleep for hopefully 8 hours so that I am fully rested and tackle another great and fantastic day.

These are the things that my daughter Taylor really does well and mostly far better than me. She does all the active things, and then bakes, reads, sleeps, hangs out with friends and even talking to the dogs. All the things a kid should do but it is all measured.

Taylor’s Balanced Schedule

We were talking to a newspaper reporter a few months ago and she was asking what kind of difficulties that we have with Taylor and her Kidney Disease and I told her that it was not a big deal. My wife looked at me like I was crazy and then started listing off all the things we need to do; hospital visits, vitamins, shots, blood work. When I heard it that way it sounded like a very tough lifestyle. But realistically I think that our of everyone in the house my daughter really has everything together much better than any of the rest of us do.

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Where to Find Support For Your Weight Loss Efforts

Losing weight is not an easy thing to do, especially when you’re tackling it by yourself. With some support from people around you, you’ll be more likely to help yourself to get through the tough points, and you’ll have someone else to show you how far you’ve come.

Humans are naturally social and generally rely on each other for their wellbeing, whether it’s completing a task together or just giving emotional support to one another. This applies even more when you’re trying to lose weight. It’s not easy at the best of times, let alone when you’re trying to do it alone. So where are the best places to find support?

Friends And Family

Friends and family are the best people to get support from when you embark on your weight loss journey. After all, they’re the closest people to you and can understand you the best. You may also feel more comfortable sharing your weight loss experience with them.

Make sure you look for someone you trust and are close to when you ask for their support. This can be anyone, for example your best friend or a sibling. You can tell them about your goals and plans for your weight loss efforts so that they can keep you on track. You can also share your difficulties with them when you bump into a wall during your efforts.

If you are not content with just telling your family or friends about your weight goals, you can also get them to actively participate in your efforts. You can ask them to play some sports with you on the weekends, or join you when you go for a jog. Having an exercise buddy is always a good motivation!

Whatever you do, don’t ask someone who doesn’t believe in you and tells you that you can’t do it. Although some people are motivated by negativity, you’ll be far more likely to succeed if you have some positive encouragement from those you know and love.

Weight Loss Clubs

If you’re not very comfortable getting support from your friends and family, you can always join a weight loss club or fitness club. By joining a club like this, you can meet others with goals similar to yours. You can befriend many people who go through the same experiences you do, and all of you can encourage each other on your weight loss journeys. It can also be fun to share experiences and ideas on how to lose weight.

Besides getting support from club members, you can also get to know the gym instructors and ask them for guidance on effective weight loss.

The most important point is that you get health and motivation from somewhere. Numerous studies have shown that people are more likely to see success in their weight loss efforts when they track their progress and take advantage of the support of others.



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