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General Weight Loss Tips

Contradiction

As usual you guys never cease to amaze me. Who knew so many women would show up to yesterday’s conversation and share their experience? I’m not alone. And we can figure out a way to cope. And more importantly keep going. I found that  the act of writing about my issues with PMS helped tremendously. Coming clean, as to say- here it is, this is where I’m going to need help. Writing is the best therapy for me. It makes me lighter.

I’m doing well. Hell, I’m doing good even. Yes I am dealing with 4 pounds of water weight, but who cares? 4 pounds is not the big picture. It’s silly. It’s water. It will go away and then more will go away and I will be a better person for sticking it out. My weight does not make me a bad person. This is a daily reminder. Being obese is not a crime.

And this brings me to my next topic: contradiction. I would say 100% that my beliefs and ideas contradict each other. This may be confusing to some people that know me. “But you said yesterday…” yes, but I changed my mind. Or I’ve decided that this and that need to go together. It’s just how I am and the way I eat is no different.

Case in point: Since starting “paleo/eating better for me” I’ve taken grains and sugar out of my diet. I’ve cut down on dairy, starches and simple carbs. But. But is big here. I will eat them. And have eaten them. While traveling and dining with friends over the weekend I realized how insane we sound. “No thanks, I’ll pass on the bread. Sure, I’ll have a drink. Gnocci? yeah, sure why not?”. What?!!?

Call it justification, but here’s the deal. I’m learning that rules can be broken and personalized. I know what is and isn’t a good idea for me. I skipped on bread and chose to eat a sensible portion of gnocchi. I was hungry, it came with my meal, I ate it. Yes it’s a starch. Yes I said no to bread. Aren’t they one in the same? Technically, yes.

Here’s another example. On our way home we stopped at Cracker Barrel for dinner. We both chose the home style fried chicken. Skipped the bread and skipped the starchy sides. Drank water and didn’t have dessert. In the past, I would have had the fried chicken with mashed potatoes, a house salad drenched in ranch, two biscuits, sweet tea and bring on the apple cobbler! The difference is notable and real. Is the chicken breaded and deep fried? Yes! I ordered it with green beans and a salad. Skimped on the dressing and gave some chicken to the husband.

Want another example? In Charlottesville I had frozen yogurt from Sweet Frog. A planned treat. I can’t tell you how long I’ve wanted a big cup of frozen yogurt topped with candy. So what do I do? I eat a very light breakfast of eggs. Skip lunch (not hungry). Have a light dinner (the gnocchi one from above) and then indulge in frozen yogurt. And topped it off with a long walk. I was even under my calories for the day.

I will have the occasional iced latte. I have brown rice almost every single day for dinner. I will put feta or goat cheese on a salad. I’m okay with all of these decisions because they aren’t what brought me here. 1 cup of brown rice a day didn’t make me obese. I don’t sneak around with salads with feta and the iced latte without sugar? We have a solid friendship. If I said no to all of these things, I wouldn’t last a week. I would be sad and cry a little. They aren’t the problem.

Pints of ice cream. Large frozen pizzas. Ordering meals with the most food. Stuffing myself. Snacks. Eating without hunger. Starting over…tomorrow will be better. I will be healthier next week. This mentality brought me to obesity. Consuming so much that I can’t move is the problem.

I’m slowly getting the point. Making better decisions. Planning. And while it may all sound like one big contradiction, it’s working for me. I know where to say no and where to say yes and the biggest point? I’m okay with it all. Being okay with the decision to eat a big bowl of frozen yogurt stops me from wanting more. It keeps me present. I’m here, I’m enjoying this and when it’s gone I can go on with my life.

I have events and dinners going on all the time. If I go to a friends house and they serve me a big plate of grains or lasagna, I’m not going to turn my nose up and say “ewww carbs!” I will enjoy, stop when I’m full and move on. I may eat lighter during the day or make sure I exercise or say no to dessert.

This is why I don’t like telling people what I’m doing because it doesn’t make much sense. In total. I’m eating less. I’m being pickier. I’m avoiding triggers. And if faced with something particularly delicious. I feel like I can enjoy it and move on with a plan of action.  I can stick with the low grains/sugar thing most of the time. At home, it’s no big deal. And that’s when it matters most. What I do most of the time is more important than what I do on occasion.

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Energy

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about energy. Stuff, items, people in my life that give energy and those that take energy. Exercise gives me energy, TV takes energy. Fresh home cooked food gives energy, processed foods take it away. Folks with a sense of humor and an easy smile give energy, those with excess drama take it. Having clutter takes energy, organized spaces gives energy. I want to bring energy into my life, and give it out too.

In the past couple of years I’ve really pushed myself to grow as a person. Pushing myself to put kindness first. To be vulnerable in friendships and relationships. To be the first one to smile or offer help. I’ve stopped waiting for other people to be the better person. And by doing this, my energy has lifted. I’m still not perfect at this, because it’s truly a challenge.

Being better everyday takes a lot of energy. To be the person I know I can be- takes lots and lots of energy. And I wasn’t sure until now that I was up for the challenge. Some days I still don’t think I am.

Being a healthy person inside and out takes a lot of work. It’s work to take care of myself when I’d rather sit and work for hours (forgetting to eat, drink or even pee). It takes energy to show up and be there for myself- to exercise, to make an alternative food choice, to eat less. To show up and not tune everything out is hard. To shut down when stress steps in, or when things aren’t going my way.

When I don’t take care of myself I want to zone out with bad food and TV. I’ve seen this pattern over and over in my life. Escaping when I stop nourishing my body and mind.

I say part of this to say that when Miranda mentioned giving up TV for Lent I jumped on board. What in the world would I do instead of watch TV? Probably lots of good, energy giving activities. Maybe I will just sit outside and stare out. Maybe I will learn to sew myself a skirt. Maybe I will write a kind letter to a friend. I want to get energy and give it back by not watching TV. Watching TV doesn’t nourish my soul or give me energy in the ways I always hope it will.

So instead of giving it up just for Lent; I just need this now. I’m giving it up for two months starting today. The only exception, of course, will be in case of an emergency and exercise DVDs. No more jeopary, marathon episodes of Grey’s Anatomy, or my beloved PBS specials about things like wolverines.  I’m kind of excited, and kind of scared.

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TFG: Cook Along: Bosnian Pita with Spinach Filling

FYI: This is a lengthy post, you will find this weeks Cook Along challenge at the bottom.

This is what I know for sure: cooking is important. I believe in food, I believe in cooking, I believe in working for delicious, healthful and satisfying food. Cooking at home is cheaper than eating out and you will always know exactly what you’re eating.

And so the Cook Along (or cookalong) was born out of this belief. The belief that getting in the kitchen will somehow make me a better person. I know this to be true. There is a satisfaction that I cannot explain in words that comes to me when I’ve prepared a meal. Some strange force that makes me feel human and whole when I shop locally. Cooking makes me feel like I have the power to change my life and the world around me.