Tag: Workout

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General Weight Loss Tips

Week Five

I’m in week five of the Insanity Workout and have so much that I want to make note of. So much so that I’m thinking about doing a video post. Here are my random, jumbled thoughts (when I really should be in bed) about exercising everyday…

1) It’s okay to exercise everyday. This hurdle has been huge for me and one that took me awhile to get over. In my mind daily exercise was unnecessary. I even got a comment on twitter from someone saying “watch out or you’ll burn out”. I felt defensive over that, a feeling that I often battle with when unsolicited advice comes my way. I feel like I shouldn’t have to defend exercising everyday.

My perspective is changing. What used to seem like a lot of exercise, 45 minutes, now seems like nothing. In fact I’m thinking in a whole day 45 minutes isn’t much. And then to think that I was barely getting that a week, or even three times a week is sort of astounding to me. But that’s what changing your perspective will do. I can exercise every day and not burn out. I think the reason is that I’m not expecting perfection with every workout. Most days I push myself and give it my all, but there have been some days when I’m barely showing up. I’m just going through the motions to get it over with. But I’m showing up and that’s what matters. I think before, just showing up was never good enough for the perfectionist in me, so I wouldn’t show up at all. I was all or nothing,  now I just do my best.

2) I am not losing a ton of weight. Before I started exercising intensely everyday  I used to think that’s all I needed to do to lose weight. Just one hour or so of intense exercise and I could eat what I wanted. I’m not sure why I thought this or where this idea came into play, but it’s simply not true. It is helpful for not gaining weight and that’s it. I’ve lost a little weight and I can tell that my waist is more defined and I’m much stronger. But, that 10-20 lbs. of weight that I thought would fall off effortlessly? not so.

I’m very very slowly getting my eating habits in check. This will be my next hurdle that I need to deal with. Exercise has been the first one and next will be food. And when I have both, well, I’ll be set. I mentally count calories, but sometimes I just want to eat. I still want to eat for comfort. I am eating better in general, cooking more at home and not eating refined sugar. I know that my next step is getting serious about planning ahead and counting calories. I can do it for about four days before I just get so tired of it.

3) Exercise can be mentally uncomfortable. I used to think that I had a hard time exercising because it was physically uncomfortable, it was too hard, I didn’t have enough time, I was lazy, etc. But, the truth is, exercise makes me face the uncomfortable facts about my body. It brings out emotions that are dormant during inactivity. I notice my size more, I notice the space I take up, I notice the effects of excess weight on my body. Stuff that I’ve tried to ignore or hide- suddenly become clear when I move my body like it’s meant to. When I can’t do yoga poses because of fat getting in the way. When my arms and wrists give out when I try to do push-ups. When I can’t grab my ankle for a quad stretch. Basic, human movements that are hard to do when you’re obese. Exercise is like shining a spotlight on everything I can’t do, and it is uncomfortable for me.

I once heard that the body stores emotions. It holds on to whatever we are dealing with (or not dealing with) and when we exercise these emotions can be released. I’ve experienced this. It makes me want to cry, or hide away. It can be intense when what you aren’t dealing with is released even when you’re not ready. And I think this is one reason why I’ve had a hard time sticking to consistent movement- it can unleash pain. For me, not letting it out in the form of exercise has lead to depression. I still suffer from my one hormonal week a month, but I feel like things are becoming clearer mentally.  Like the things I’ve been holding inside are coming out through energy and movement. I’m okay with being uncomfortable.

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What I Couldn’t Do Two Weeks Ago

There is something to be said about trying something you know you can’t do.  Every time I go to the gym I stare down the hanging leg raise. Have you seen it?

Basically you have to hold your body up while pulling your legs up to your chest. For those that can do it, they make it look easy. For the rest of us, well, it’s kind of sad (and kind of funny) to watch. I decided I was okay with making a fool of myself January 20th and get on.

I couldn’t even hold myself up to hang. It was truly painful, so I got off and decided that this would be a progress point for me.

Two weeks later, back at the gym I decided to get on again. I knew in my mind that holding my weight up with my arms would be hard, but I wanted to try again. This time, not only could I support my weight, I was able to lift my knees up to my chest not once, not twice, not three times…but four times.

I was so shocked that I stopped. Am I really doing this? I couldn’t even hold myself up two weeks ago! And sure enough I think I could have done a couple more had I not been so freakin’ excited.

So that is real progress that I can see. It’s not a lower number on the scale, or looser fitting jeans- it was proof that I’m getting in better shape.

Today begins week four of the Insanity workout training and I have to say that working out every day has gotten easier mentally. I know what to expect and I’ve accepted that 45 minutes of my day will be spent exercising. I’ve never worked out this hard in my life on a consistent basis. Not even during couch to 5k training. It’s hard for me to believe that I’ve exercised all but three (I take sundays off) days in the past three weeks.

We’ve got more plans. As the weather gets warmer and our stamina increases, we’re going to add running back to our schedule three days a week.

Right now the exercise schedule looks like this:

Monday-Wednesday : Insanity workout

Thursday: yoga and strength training

Friday- Saturday: Insanity workout

Sunday: Off

In about a month it will look like this:

Monday, Wednesday, Friday: Insanity workout + running

Tuesday, Saturday: Insanity workout

Thursday: yoga and strength

Sunday: Off day

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January Wrap-Up and Looking Ahead

I was reading Caroline’s blog this morning and cracking up over her “it will be christmas again soon” sentiment. January is coming to a close and well, here comes February.

So far this year I find myself every week checking in with my goals. The goals I set at the beginning of the year, and the new goals that develop as the year progresses. I use Sundays as my goal gathering and planning day and find that it helps keep me in check for the following week.

As I look back over the month I see a list of stuff on my calendar that I did do and didn’t do. The first couple of weeks of the year I didn’t exercise much mainly because I was cramming all of my time with extra projects. Each of those days I had on my to do list “do insanity workout” and then finally the last two weeks of the month I did it. I did Insanity every day (with Sundays off). I write this, along with all of my posts, as a reminder to myself that I’m not giving up.

What if I let those first two weeks set the tone for the year? What if I was determined to be perfect, a new person on January 1st? Would I have given up completely on the idea that eventually I’d get into it. And I did.

I’ve said this before, but when I think about why I blog. Why I share my struggles, why after 4.5 years I still come to this place to share where I’m at even if it is sometimes painful and slightly embarrassing…it’s because of my potential. It’s because deep down I trust that each time I try something new, I’m getting closer. Sticking to this one thing, even if at times I truly wasn’t here, or struggling to be here- I knew somehow there was some important growing going on even if it didn’t always feel like.

With that said, I’m just two weeks in. It’s not over, it’s not even close from over. And I have to realize that. That I need more weeks like I’ve had, adding up on each other. There isn’t a stopping point. This is my life now, if I choose to accept it. My life as someone who has to exercise, who has to consider what she is eating. This isn’t a temporary blip, a chapter of my life that ends when I see a reasonable number on the scale. I’m making this my life now.

I’ve gotten to the point where I can honestly say that the desire to be healthy is much stronger than the desire to overeat or not exercise. I’m not saying I’m cured, or perfect, or won’t even overeat again but I’ve never felt that before. I’ve always wanted the easy path. I wanted to still eat everything I wanted, I didn’t want to sacrifice my time. I didn’t want to push myself. Sure I came here, and logged exercise and points or calories. I’ve done that, but I did it in the mindset of “this is temporary, this won’t be my life forever”.

I’ve accepted that this is who I am. Someone who has to watch what she eats, and someone who has to push hard during exercise. This is my life now. I can push myself harder than I thought. I can realistically exercise everyday without getting burned out. I can take time to prepare meals. This isn’t punishment, this is investment.

So as I look ahead to February I see more solid weeks of exercise. More calorie counting. It looks fun and promising. I will eat delicious and whole foods. I will cook as much as possible. I will try new recipes. I will not go to bed without exercising. I will take Sundays off to rest.

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