Big Picture – Weight Loss Diet Solutions

As usual you guys never cease to amaze me. Who knew so many women would show up to yesterday’s conversation and share their experience? I’m not alone. And we can figure out a way to cope. And more importantly keep going. I found that the act of writing about my issues with PMS helped tremendously. Coming clean, as to say- here it is, this is where I’m going to need help. Writing is the best therapy for me. It makes me lighter.

I’m doing well. Hell, I’m doing good even. Yes I am dealing with 4 pounds of water weight, but who cares? 4 pounds is not the big picture. It’s silly. It’s water. It will go away and then more will go away and I will be a better person for sticking it out. My weight does not make me a bad person. This is a daily reminder. Being obese is not a crime.

And this brings me to my next topic: contradiction. I would say 100% that my beliefs and ideas contradict each other. This may be confusing to some people that know me. “But you said yesterday…” yes, but I changed my mind. Or I’ve decided that this and that need to go together. It’s just how I am and the way I eat is no different.

Case in point: Since starting “paleo/eating better for me” I’ve taken grains and sugar out of my diet. I’ve cut down on dairy, starches and simple carbs. But. But is big here. I will eat them. And have eaten them. While traveling and dining with friends over the weekend I realized how insane we sound. “No thanks, I’ll pass on the bread. Sure, I’ll have a drink. Gnocci? yeah, sure why not?”. What?!!?

Call it justification, but here’s the deal. I’m learning that rules can be broken and personalized. I know what is and isn’t a good idea for me. I skipped on bread and chose to eat a sensible portion of gnocchi. I was hungry, it came with my meal, I ate it. Yes it’s a starch. Yes I said no to bread. Aren’t they one in the same? Technically, yes.

Here’s another example. On our way home we stopped at Cracker Barrel for dinner. We both chose the home style fried chicken. Skipped the bread and skipped the starchy sides. Drank water and didn’t have dessert. In the past, I would have had the fried chicken with mashed potatoes, a house salad drenched in ranch, two biscuits, sweet tea and bring on the apple cobbler! The difference is notable and real. Is the chicken breaded and deep fried? Yes! I ordered it with green beans and a salad. Skimped on the dressing and gave some chicken to the husband.

Want another example? In Charlottesville I had frozen yogurt from Sweet Frog. A planned treat. I can’t tell you how long I’ve wanted a big cup of frozen yogurt topped with candy. So what do I do? I eat a very light breakfast of eggs. Skip lunch (not hungry). Have a light dinner (the gnocchi one from above) and then indulge in frozen yogurt. And topped it off with a long walk. I was even under my calories for the day.

I will have the occasional iced latte. I have brown rice almost every single day for dinner. I will put feta or goat cheese on a salad. I’m okay with all of these decisions because they aren’t what brought me here. 1 cup of brown rice a day didn’t make me obese. I don’t sneak around with salads with feta and the iced latte without sugar? We have a solid friendship. If I said no to all of these things, I wouldn’t last a week. I would be sad and cry a little. They aren’t the problem.

Pints of ice cream. Large frozen pizzas. Ordering meals with the most food. Stuffing myself. Snacks. Eating without hunger. Starting over…tomorrow will be better. I will be healthier next week. This mentality brought me to obesity. Consuming so much that I can’t move is the problem.

I’m slowly getting the point. Making better decisions. Planning. And while it may all sound like one big contradiction, it’s working for me. I know where to say no and where to say yes and the biggest point? I’m okay with it all. Being okay with the decision to eat a big bowl of frozen yogurt stops me from wanting more. It keeps me present. I’m here, I’m enjoying this and when it’s gone I can go on with my life.

I have events and dinners going on all the time. If I go to a friends house and they serve me a big plate of grains or lasagna, I’m not going to turn my nose up and say “ewww carbs!” I will enjoy, stop when I’m full and move on. I may eat lighter during the day or make sure I exercise or say no to dessert.

This is why I don’t like telling people what I’m doing because it doesn’t make much sense. In total. I’m eating less. I’m being pickier. I’m avoiding triggers. And if faced with something particularly delicious. I feel like I can enjoy it and move on with a plan of action. I can stick with the low grains/sugar thing most of the time. At home, it’s no big deal. And that’s when it matters most. What I do most of the time is more important than what I do on occasion.

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Last week I was swamped. Catching up on projects, sending out jewelry, and doing a lot of cooking. I took photos of my food, but before I knew it I was going to bed. I just didn’t have the time and energy to post last week, but there was another issue going on.

This could have been preventable as it was a pattern and I see it now, but at the time I was annoyed and I let it get the best of me. The week before last when I was posting photos of my food everyday, I was also doing something else secretly: I was weighing myself everyday. This is a bad habit and it doesn’t consider the big picture. Logically I know this. But, I was losing. Every day the scale was lower and I was like a moth to a flame.

So Saturday in DC came and we ended up walking close to nine miles. I don’t walk a lot and it just about did me in. The next day I got on my friends scale and noticed that my weight was up. Water retention. And then the next day we walked some more and I ate a very salty Thai meal. And on Monday we drove home. Which caused another spike in my weight. When I travel, I blow up. I KNOW this about myself.

But when I got home and stepped on the scale all I saw was work undone and I was upset and annoyed. I know the lesson of this is: I retain water and that is the stage I’m in: losing water. I also know that exercise and travel always causes my weight to fluctuate.

Instead of being healthy about it, continue doing what I was doing (which was working) I just said “f this” and stopped. Everything. We ate out almost everyday last week and didn’t exercise until this past Sunday. If that wasn’t sabotage I don’t know what is.

Looking back, I wish I would have just shrugged it off, stopped weighing myself, exercise and watch what I was eating, and drink lots of water. It would have gone away and things would have evened out again. So this is my calling myself out on destructive behavior.

This is also me continuing what I set out to do this month: kick ass. And so it continues. Fluctuations are not the big picture. Five pounds up or down is not the big picture. Doing good consistently is.

And now I bring you my eats from yesterday (monday):

I was not hungry until about noon yesterday. Instead I drank lots and lots of water. I came home for lunch where I prepared a plate of rice, onions in masala sauce (trader joe’s), spinach (with dressing and a little feta), and half a slice of tandoori naan. Total calories: 535

Later on in the afternoon I was hit with the baking bug. I purchased a bag of Sucanat over the weekend and was itching to try it. You can read more about it here. What I miss most about being sweet-free is baking. I also miss having a muffin for breakfast and so I’ve decided to add natural sugars into my diet (I’ve been eating honey for awhile).

I loved getting in the kitchen and figuring out a new, healthier recipe for muffins. I can’t describe the satisfaction really, but these are quite good. I used whole wheat white flour, sucanat and my own apple sauce. They are a bit higher in calories than I had hoped, I used vegetable oil and filled the muffin cups pretty full- I like muffin tops, what can I say?

I followed Krissie’s advice and froze the rest for reheating throughout the week and to avoid eating too many. I ate two at 166 calories each.

For dinner I made a pepper, onion and spinach stir fry in a Chinese sauce over rice. This was surprisingly filling and low in calories. I actually calculated it several times to make sure I was correct. Calories: 300 (maybe a little less)

And for a night snack I made smoothies with bananas, milk, frozen mango, frozen cherries, a splash of vanilla and walnuts. About 250 calories

Total calories for the day: 1,417

Exercise: 45 minutes of Insanity, burned about 400-500 calories

Earned my sticker for the day!

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